Edwards to admit paternity of ex-mistress' child

or
On The Next Maury: Edwards Gets Reille

Sources say that John Edwards will fess up to fathering the child of his former mistress.

Sources have told WRAL News that they expect former U.S. Sen. John Edwards to admit that he is the father of his former mistress' 18-month-old daughter.

Edwards, a two-time Democratic presidential candidate, confessed last August to having an affair with Rielle Hunter, who served as a videographer on Edwards' 2008 campaign. He has denied fathering her daughter, saying his relationship with Hunter ended before the child was conceived.

His rather stalkerish former assistant had been taking that bullet for Team Ken Doll.

By confessing to having knocked up the former girlfriend of 80s literary star Jay McInerney, Edwards reduces the number of people fooled by his previous ridiculously transparent denials to exactly zero.

Psychologists repudiate gay-to-straight therapy

or
You Can't Pound Square Pegs Into Round Holes

The American Psychological Association has determined that gay-to-straight therapy advocated by many fundamentalists just doesn't work.

The American Psychological Association has declared that mental health professionals should not tell gay clients that they can become straight through therapy or other treatments.

Instead, the APA is urging therapists to consider multiple options — that could range from celibacy to switching churches — for helping clients whose sexual orientation and religious faith conflict.

Or you could just find a religion that doesn't say that God hates you for being the way he made you.

Latest CIA Scandal Puts Focus on How Agency Polices Self

or
James Bond Movies Were Never Like This

The Washington Post has a scoop on how far the CIA will go to curry favor with foreign sources:

As a novice CIA case officer in the Middle East, Andrew Warren quickly learned the value of sex in recruiting spies. Colleagues say that he made an early habit of taking informants to strip clubs, and that he later began arranging out-of-town visits to brothels for his best recruits.

He seems to have crossed a line when he started drugging women and then taping the encounters. They never put enough rules into the Secret Spy Employee Manual.

It's official: men see women in bikinis as 'sex objects'

or
Why The Swimsuit Issue Is So Popular

From Great Britain, the Independent reports that scientists hooked men up to brain scans and showed them pictures of women in skimpy clothes.

Scientists have demonstrated something that many women suspect and most men would admit only to themselves: pictures of scantily clad females turn women into sexual objects in the minds of men.

The article is fascinating not in the least because they picked Rosanna Davison, who had nothing to do with the study, to illustrate the effect.

(h/t to DLD)

Birth of octuplets rattles fertility experts

or
Imagine How It Rattles The Mom

The LA Times reports on the biggest litter of kids born yet. The experts have made one conclusion:

The chances that the eight babies born Monday were conceived naturally are infinitesimal, infertility specialists and doctors in maternal-fetal medicine say.

The mother and her children are resting and doing well at Daisy Hill Puppy Farm and Fertility Clinic.

Watch your back, Jon and Kate. These folks hit your mark all at once.

Many Teens Don't Keep Virginity Pledges

or
They Lie About Their Drinking Habits Too

This item is over a week old, but last week's Washington Post story was at least partially the inspiration for the No Duh Awards.

Teens who take virginity pledges are just as likely to have sex as teens who don't make such promises -- and they're less likely to practice safe sex to prevent disease or pregnancy, a new study finds.

I'm not aware of anything that prevents teens from having sex. Sarah Palin and Dina Lohan sure aren't either.

Report: alcohol fuels multiple sex partners, STDs

or
Beer Goggles Work

Urbanite reports that beer goggles work:

According to the report, heavy drinkers in the city tend to have more sex partners and are more likely to get sexually transmitted diseases.
{snip}
People who are influenced by alcohol are more likely to sleep with people they otherwise wouldn’t and use condoms incorrectly, Locker said.

The reaction has been stunning in the number of forehead slaps. New York magazine uses the headline "New Yorkers Who Drink Have More Sex Partners, Warns Survey" to issue this caution:

Oh no! So what you're telling us is that drinking increases the risk of getting laid? For the love of Betty Ford, gay dudes, put down those Cosmos unless you want to end up naked with a hot stranger!

And Gawker breaks the news this way:

Men who sleep with other men who claim to binge drink were twice as likely to have five or more sex partners in a year than those fruits what don't drank. (I don't know what the hell I'm doing wrong...) Same applies to straight folks too, just in slightly lower numbers.

Somehow I think this study was secretly funded by the National Spirits Council.